i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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