Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Hello my rib-scented angel!
Randomize
