shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
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