i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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