I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
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