Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
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