I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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