how can u be prego again
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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