just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Randomize
