oh god the rape fog is back!
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Randomize
