There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
If its not for food we ain't going out.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Randomize