who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
Randomize
