How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
how does that bad decision feel?
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
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