Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
