Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
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