I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Randomize
