You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
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