I'm gonna have a badass scar
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
I got her a Nickelback box set.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
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