Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
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