Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
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