Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Randomize
