WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
