You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize