I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Randomize
