I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
