dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Randomize
