I'm laying in your front yard are you home
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
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