I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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