Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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