Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
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