a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Randomize
