hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Randomize