At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Randomize
