I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
