How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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