Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
