brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Randomize
