I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
