I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
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