Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
