No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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