my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
did you just send me my own nude
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
