make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
