I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Randomize
