dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Randomize
