I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Holy sore nipples Batman
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Randomize
