I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
My pussy is not your playground.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Randomize
