I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
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