I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
Randomize
