i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Randomize
