But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
