sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
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