obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Randomize
